Did you see the new Inside Out movie? I have been thinking about the part when Anxiety finally crashes and admits that she was only trying to protect her. And then so lovingly, Joy, helps Anxiety settle into a cozy chair with a cup of tea and gives her permission to rest. Do you ever treat to your anxiety in such a compassionate way? I sure don’t! I usually try to shame it away or avoid it all together.

But, here’s the deal....

Could it be that we are running on fumes, trying to keep up, and our anxiety is just trying to protect us from collapsing?

I think we look at anxiety all wrong. God intelligently created us all with anxiety to protect us and survive. What do you think kicks in when we have to slam on our breaks or grab a kid before they jump in front of danger?

So could it be that our anxiety is doing its best to plan, correct, and protect all aspects of our life so nothing falls apart and we don’t feel uncomfortable?

Uncomfortable is not a fun place to be and our brains have gotten real used to avoiding it at all costs. PTL for ANXIETY!

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So let’s reflect....

Life these day are traumatic and rarely feel safe. The chronic state of bad news and urgency makes us feel overwhelmed and lonely. So instead of feeling the tension of our current situation, our mind uses anxiety to distract us from feeling uncomfortable. From my point of view, as a therapist, anxiety is doing a great job and is working overtime.

Anxiety as a whole has people over-committed, worried, catastrophizing, people-pleasing, and disconnected.

Now let’s plan....

How do we co-exist with our anxiety? How can we compassionately appreciate its efforts but still put it down for a nice nap when it is out of control? I like to use non-typical treatment for anxiety and intrusive thoughts because we are living in a non-typical world. I find that traditional CBT treatments just don’t do the trick anymore.

My go-to is learning mindfulness in order to center your mind on your present moment and not let your thoughts of future disasters take over. I also like to use self-compassion skills along with Internal Family Systems Therapy to counter intrusive thinking and redirect a client’s outlook toward positivity internally and externally. Also, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy is a key component in giving anxiety a rest. It encourages a client to focus on actions that align with their values, rather than getting caught up in obsessive thought cycles.

Mindfulness is a game changer!

Regularly practicing mindfulness can increase ones ability to center themselves quickly and live presently rather than worrying about past and future events. Popular mindfulness skills include prayer, body scans, breath work, yoga, mindful walking, and even mindful eating.

I you want to learn more about mindfulness, check out my other blog. Click this link.

Self-compassion may be the hardest skill to master.

It’s hard because it does not feel natural to be kind to ourselves. Self-compassion entails treating oneself with kindness, recognizing one’s shared humanity, and being mindful when considering negative aspects of oneself. Self-compassion increases emotional resilience and also encourage a positive attitude toward oneself without self-evaluation and comparisons. It is a kind, connected, and clear-sighted way of relating to ourselves even in instances of failure, perceived inadequacy, and imperfection (Neff, 2011).

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy [ACT] is last but definitely not least. Think of it as an anchor to hold you still during an anxiety storm.

Once you learn to center your mind and then talk to yourself compassionately, ACT then teaches one to tether themselves to a momentary truth in order to hold still during the waves of big emotions. I suggest reciting a truth, for example, that “ I am safe” or “I have survived worse” or “BUT GOD” while breathing or distracting your way through unhelpful anxious thoughts. This practice will give you strength to do it over and over again while the anxiety gets easier to manage. This anchor will hold you still as your learn to accept your momentary discomfort. This acceptance along with a commitment to make life 1% better tomorrow is powerful. Over time, this gentle approach will break the cycle of chaotic thinking and bring in a spirit of joy.

For believers in God....

He calls us to “love others as we love ourselves” (Matthew 22:39, NIV). How are we to love others when we can’t even love ourselves? God calls us to remember our identity as His child who receives new grace and mercy everyday from Him. Can we begin to look at ourselves for who we are? We are important and valued by the almighty creator who knows and controls the universe.

Never forget God’s ability...

Our hearts and minds belong to Him and he wants us to feel His peace not a storm of anxiety full of hurtful self-shaming and fear. The best way to counter Satan’s attacks on our mind is with love toward ourselves and others. We are to hold onto what we know to be true while the storm blows over and rooting ourselves in positive reflections and activities.

I find some peace in knowing that my anxiety is needed and divinely inspired.

I also find peace knowing that I can compassionately tell it to take a rest when it is not serving me well. I find power in knowing that I am in control of my mind not satan or my intrusive thoughts. Healing a hurt mind takes effort and time but pays off in BIG ways. I pray you find the peace you are searching for.

Please click on the link below if your want to connect. I would love to hear about your anxiety challenges and offer support and prayers. I am also available for free consultations if you are interested in therapy or coaching.

Be well, Whitney